Bat Man Bot by Polyfect

January 16, 2013

Okay, we’re going off reservation here and taking a look at what was sold to me as “Bat Man Bot” by an unnamed (and unscrupulous) ebay seller.  A few years back on a lark I stumbled across an ebay store that specialized in knock-off toy products.  You know, the kind of stuff you find at flea markets and Asian grocery stores.  So, I loaded up of weird crap like Cowboy Megos and squid monsters, and something called “Bat Man Bot”.  I thought, what the heck, 3 bucks and maybe we’ll get some weird Filipino Batman robot.  What I received, unfortunately, was one of those lame knock-off Transformer bots that have been hanging around KB Toys since the 80′s.  You know the ones.  There was a peacock thing, some other peacock looking thing, a lizard (?), and of course, a bat.  It is a bat, that turns into a man, that is a robot.  Bat. Man. Bot.  Well played ebay dude, well played.

Anyway, you all already know this thing sucks.  Heck, we knew this thing sucked when we were 4 in 1982.  That’s not the point.  The point is I got screwed and I need to share my pain.  This toy is what it is.  I paid $3 for it, which is about $2.50 more than it is worth, but that isn’t to say Bat Man Bot doesn’t have his charms.  The packaging is simple cardboard with plastic bubble.  Not good cardboard, mind you, it’s roughly the same thickness as a cereal box.  And not a high quality cereal like Quaker Oats, we’re talking Walmart Great Value, generic Aldi’s cereal.  That said, the pictures on the card are reasonably well in focus.

Pulling Bat Man Bat out of the card, one foot fell off.  Fair enough.  It sort of popped back on after I trimmed a bit of flashing off.  The plastic is cheap, really, really cheap.  Really.  Somehow, anything less (or better in this case?) would have been less fulfilling.  Deco is plain, combination of black and white plastic.  No paint, save the Bat eyes, but stickers make up the rest of the detail.  Surprisingly, no peeling stickers and appear to all be the right side up!  Articulation is a couple swivel joints at hips and shoulders.  Blah, blah, blah, blah.

Yeah, this toy sucks and needs to be an actual Bat Man Bot.  Enter a Microman head and a LEGO sticker.  Viola!  Ladies and gentlemen: Bat Man Bot!  He is the terror that flaps in the night!

Yeah, so, suck.  The toy sucks.  But as much as the toy sucks, and it sucks to a level where it bypasses “bad toy”, flies right by “hilariously bad toy” and lands at “can’t redeem this bad toy”, it still had been in production for 25+ years.  Bat Man Bot outlasted KB Toys.  Someone is buying this crap.  I don’t even think as kids we were duped into buying this garbage.  So the only logical people to blame are grandmas.  Yep, good ol’ Nana is the reason we are still putting up with Bat Man Bot.  For shame, Nana.  For shame.

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